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Poetry: Alison Self

Alison Self is a queer singer/songwriter and poet. She is from Petersburg, Virginia, has lived all over the United States, and currently resides in Oregon. Alison was diagnosed with colon cancer in late 2018 and has been in remission since 2019.

Find Alison Self online at


Thursday night i got home and broke down

got down on my knees next to my bed

like a little kid would do in a movie

precious moments

cried my eyes out into my mattress

so no one would hear

i put my hands together and prayed

aint done that since I was little

when you grow up the way i did

you just figure god forgot about you

even if he was there, he’s just busy

take a number

and put your problems on lay away

i prayed to anything that would listen

that i wouldn’t have to move again

that one day i would feel safe, stable

nobody answered so i just went to bed


Would you come watch the rain with me?

We can take off our shoes

and take a drink

straight from the bottle

every time its intensity changes

and you can finish

telling me that story where

in a dream

you were floating

i’ll hold your hand

you can hold mine back

if you want to

ill cackle

as wine drips from the corner of your mouth

from holding back laughter


we can tear apart flowers

blades of grass


then each of us

can silently

feel bad for doing that

and imagine

what a funeral

for a flower

would look like


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